I gave myself 5 more minutes to overwatch the target area some 400+ yards away. Any longer than that and I felt I would not be able to accurately identify, nor accurately engage, any likely suspects that happened to wander into the small window of opportunity. These last 15 minutes were critical. This was the time when movement was most likely. The first and last glimmers of sunlight provides a sense of security for the hunted. As it was, nothing moved. We were not eating meat tonight. Just kale chips and almonds. What a failure I was. I didn’t deserve to wear flannel shirts and I should shave off my beard. In fact, had this been the time of Mammoths and cave quarters, I’d be banished from my tribe and would never have a “baby momma”.
I’ve thought long and hard about why I continue to lumber through the forests, wade through the swamps, and push my physical capabilities to the test all in the pursuit of wild game. Wouldn’t it be easier to simply stumble into a local market, throw a bunch of meat and vegetables into a trendy tote that I picked up from a Pinterest link? Hell, I would even be able to get .10 cents off my next gallon of gas. Sounds like a logical choice, right?
Hunting, even thought it is one of the largest sources of revenue for the entire country (Economic Data), an effective way to manage herd populations, helps maintain the health of a particular herd, and is the longest standing tradition in human existence, has become a focal point for heated debate. Just last night, I got into a discussion with an interesting lad about the topic of hunting. I don’t remember his name but he looked like a Timmy. Timmy is the ultimate Lumber Sexual, Hipster, who claims that he “has never hunted nor did he see it as a fitting activity for humans to participate in in the 21st century”.
I understood Timmy’s bold opinion and tried to explain my reasoning best I could. I told him that I continue to partake in this pre-historic activity, even during a time when society is rapidly progressing because of the following facts:
- I like doing it
- I have a bird dog who is bred and trained to do it
- I have a bird dog who likes doing it with me
- I don’t care what you think Timmy.
I then told Timmy that his shirt didn’t match his shoes and his beard was uneven. I think he lost consciousness and left the bar.